no subject!

Ok....first of all....all of J-Land needs an enima! Maybe that will "weed" out most of these trouble makers that alot of us are dealing with!

 

J-Land chat

Occasion: J-land Chat
Date: Sunday 11 February 2007
Time: 2100 / 9pm UK time, which is:
1600 / 4pm EST
1500 / 3pm CST
1400 / 2pm MST
1300 / 1pm PST
Duration: 2 hours, or however long people feel like
Subjects: Nothing specific
Location: Special Interests - Journals Cafe (AOL only)
Hosts: Yours truly and Cathy [Luddie343]"

Just one of those days!

Good morning....for me, it's still good evening! I still haven't been to bed yet! uuuhhh!
Ok....my day yesteday just was one of those days you'd like to forget about or just sleep through! Well...I didn't and I couldn't! My husband was home again from work because he needed to work on his car. Well, I was in alot of pain. So, I was doing my thing to feel better, and minding my own business. My son and I did have a good talk though. :o) He has so much on his mind. My daughter's boy friend is moving out. He got an apartment here in town. The wedding is called off. I took two of my Dorvicets for the pain, and my grandson was already in my bed napping! :o) So, I crawled in bed and snuggle bunny snuggled up to me! :o) I get up, and I'd noticed that my husband had been in a bicthy mood all day! When that happens, we all try and stay out of his way!

My daughter and I were sitting here at the computer talking. My son comes down the stairs because he was going up north to go snow boarding! Just as he stepped off the stairs, my husband made and uncalled for comment to him, which then set him off! I didn't blame my son...it was not a very nice thing to say at all! It was like my husband had been trying all day to pick a fight with someone and he found somebody! :o( They got into it! Then he turned and was talking to me, and it had something to do with our talk we had earlier. My husband started yelling at the both of us! I told him to shut up because my son was talking to ME and not HIM and to stay out of it! My daughter was sitting on my walker, and she heard it all! Then my son went ahead and left. :o( Which more then likely spoiled his mood about going snow boarding. I took two vicodine's to calm my self down, because I was shacking ny then, pretty bad! My husband slammed out to the garage! I aske my daughter if I was taking him wrong and if her brother took him wrong as well? She said NO WAY! And she said that she was afraid that she would be next to be picked on! :o( And thats sad! :o( But I was NOT going to back down from him at all, because he had my stomach hurting so bad, and I thought that he isn't the only one in this house that has things on his mind....we all do! But he seems to think his is always worse then ares! And when he does that, it really makes me mad real quick! He'd asked me yesterday if "I" ever felt my legs hurt this certain way!? HUH? I just gave him a look to kill! Becasue he was complaining about it! And then had the nerve to actually ask me that! :o( gggrrr! I told him what in the hell do you think I live with everyday of my life, and will continue to do so? That pissed him off! He gave me that look, so I just turned around and walked away from him! I took two more Dorvicets. I as sitting in bed "trying" to relax and help my pain. Then I just started to icth! All over! I thought that my nerves gave me hives again! That happens, when I really get upset, I get hives pretty bad! I was even put in the hospital for a week before because of them....yes, I was married to him then too! They were on my feet to the top of my head and in my mouth and throat! So, I try not to let him get me upset too much...but, he still can do it in no time flat!

And then here he came! My heart sank to my stomach! It's no wonder I have ulcers! Good grief! He asked me if "I" thought he did wrong with my son! Uh! Oh hell yea! I heard what he said, and I told him from my mouth, and I said now how would you have taken it? And how would you have liked it? Well....that pissed him off! I told my daughter that was sitting in here with me, "the truth hurts....and if you don't want to know the truth, then don't ask me, because thats what you're going to get!" I felt like running away and so did my daughter! And thats no way to live! :o( I had the shakes so bad because of my nerves, and I'm NOT suppose to be PUT in that kind of situation because of my heart and alot of other illnesses I have!
I took two Benedryls because of the itching! I had all of that medicine in my system, and I couldn't even eat! He came in and asked me if I wanted to eat and I told him that I couldn't because my stomach was too upset and my ulcers were burning bad! :o( I have maalox to take, but I knew if I would have taken it at that time, it would have come right back up! I still haven't had anything to eat. And I'm on my second pot of coffee!
I asked him in the morning yesterday, to let me know which one of my credit cards had the most credit limit on it. And I also gave him more money to pay them all! Even though he has them, thinking that he's "Mister Bad ass", I still can use the ones he took, I have all of the reciets right here! After the incodent with my son, he came over to me, leaned down, got in my face, and asked me if I still need to know right then and there the credit card that had the most credit limit on it? I told him NO! He just needed someone else to pick on, and I was sitting in his leathal path! I told him that what I asked earlier, if he could let me know which card has the most limit on it, because I wanted the most paid on that one! But, he didn't give me the chance to finish what I was saying! My money and my cards! He just has to have some kind of control over me...so I think thats why he stripped me of them! They are mine and I do pay them all every month! I give HIM my money! I feel like I'm living with my abusive step dad! He was a drunk to! And treated me this way! After he got done asking me that question, he said in a louder voice, "Why do YOU look like I just beat you, or am going to beat you?" I told him that I'd rather he would have...because the bruises go away quicker...but what he was doing to me by verbal abuse doesn't go away! He didn't like that one either! But it's true, and thats what I told him! I told him that he grew up in a verbal abusive house as well as I did, and that he should know how it feels! He just looked at me, shook his head, and turned around and went back out to the garage! I turned around to my daughter and said good place for him right now!
And yesterday....in my graphic group, the owner, I seen that she now has her graphic journal private! She had written in one of her group emails that she deleted her journal, and has put her graphic joural private because of the disturbing happenings going on around J-land! Oh GEE! I wonder who that was geared at? As if!
The whole day was a slap in the face! Everytime I turned the other cheeck, it got slapped too! You know what? I'm pretty sore from it!
                           Yesterday
-All I wanted was to see which credit card had the most limit which would have the least amount to pay on it...so that I could have him pay it off.
-My stomach has been bothering me. Like I'm sick or something. I'm made to feel like I shouldn't say anything, so next time I won't....I sit close to you and make you sick, then you'll feel what I felt then!
-Sure! You want to come toe to toe with me, bring IT ON!
- Who pays for what around here?
- The lack of respect for all of us is really getting old...just grow up!
- My kids come first WAY before you, so leave them alone! They avoid you.....Please do me a favor, and ask them why!
I'm done!
Gods blessings to all of you!

~I will not........~

                                                                    

                       Raven's Lament

                                                                                            

                                        By; Indigo

                                  

Before I even begin this entry, I just want

all my dear friends to know this in no way applies to them........This is me entirely , how I feel about myself, those around me and the world in general. But I will say it comes to light with certain circumstances that have taken place abroad in J-land. I seriously gave this alot of thought, as well as some deep soul searching. I know at some point I'm going to offend someone. All I can say to that is "That's life". Not everyone will agree with my thinking. And I most certainly may not agree with yours.......but I will respect you as a person, an individual who has a right to their own opinions. Fair Enough? If you like the following segment , feel free to use it as your own, post it, pass it on, the world could use a little more enlightment don't you agree?

I Will Not Judge You

For your beliefs. For I have friends from every spectrum of beliefs across the map. My feelings are whatever they need to keep the warmth of their souls alive. Who am I to say what you need to give you strength in your day?

By the color of your skin. Your skin, hair or eye color, have nothing to do with the heart within.

I will not judge you for your wealth. For richer or poorer , you still have a soul, a heart that nourishes friendships and love.

Nor will I judge you for your age. For we continue to learn no matter what age we are. Everyone has something to contribute to our lives if we listen.

Most certainly not for your health. I have seen the weakest of the weak with the biggest hearts alive. No matter what your health you still feel, need, love just like everyone else. Everything outside is but a shell that holds the heart within.

I will not judge you for the company you keep and call friends. Life is made up of a variety of humanity. What may interest one person may not interest another. Keeping an open mind to all aspects of life, leaves no room for judgement here.

There is no judge , who can tell you who your heart belongs to; Who your partner of choice may be. That is all there is to say on this subject in a nutshell. Many times in life we don't even have the choice ourselves when it comes to who our hearts are most fond. I find no wrong in someones happiness and love.

I will not judge you by the country of your birth or loyalty. There is a world out there beyond my doors.......why should I shut out the possiblity that another way of life may be lived by others? They still bleed, they still hurt and most important of all they still love.

Nor will I judge you for the job you work, or the lack of work thereof. As the old saying goes it may be a dirty job, but someone has to do it (winks) We all make a living in our own way. Living day to day tends to require a bit of work wouldn't you say?

I will not judge you by the clothes you wear. My wouldn't the world be boring if we all wore the same clothing, with no personality what so ever? Be as funky or bland as you desire. Give in to your hearts content.

I certainly won't judge you for the home you keep. Wither you live in a tent , or a mansion keep. I see a human being in need of a friend no matter who you meet.

I'm not a judge, a jury, or anything else that will condemn you. I am a Friend !!

I accept you as you are. Nothing less , nothing more. In matters of the heart, I'll keep you close for friendship does NOT judge another.

I hope you found some enjoyment in this......I will NOT judge another. This is who I am, take it or leave it. Don't expect me to abandon my opinions or choices because they may not mirror yours. In the end we are all human beings who can think and choose for ourselves. If we all followed the simple philosophy of this post, wouldn't the world be a lot kinder, gentler, loving and forgiving? For all we could wish, it comes down to those who DO judge. Perhaps someday we will all agree to disagree in the essence of harmony. Stay safe and loved !!!

CarnivAOL

Please visit CarnivAOL ! I do have an entry called 1997.

Thank you! :o)

                               Lisa

The weather

Yesterday and most of the night, we had our first big snow fall! It got bad.
My sister had called me....she and her friend were on their way to the Dayton Mall, south of us. At that time when she started out, it wasn't bad. They got as far as Dayton, and they were driving on I75...and got into an accident! When they got into the bad weather, they could only go 35 mph. They hit a wall head on because of it was very slippery! She called me in shock! She could hardly talk, but did get out that information and that the car was smashed up against the wall and the doors were smashed in and they couldn't get out! I heard the girl that was driving in the back ground screaming and freaking out! God bless her! :o( With it being this cold out and being on the highway, I was worried about them! I told her to get off the phone with me and call 911. She was so scared, I was who she could think of to call. :o( I didn't here from here the rest of the night, and I was worried. I called this morning and woke her up, and didin't mean to do that. She said that the police and the ambulance came and got them out and took them to the hospital. Whew! She has whiplash and is bruised where the seatbelt was and has scrapes and other bruises, and is just stiff and sore. I was so relived! I told her to go back to bed and get sleep. She sounded so much better then yesterday. It really got bad here real quick!

My husband left from work before 5:00! He works in Sidney, the town thats just north to us. It takes only 10 minutes to get there! He didn't have his cell phone on him. So I had no way of getting ahold of him. :o( I was worried about him as well! Very worried! His tires are bold! And he doesn't take the same way home all the time, so if anything would happen, I wouldn't know which way he would be. It was 6:30, and he still wasn't home yet! My stomach was in knots! I'm a "worry wort" anyways, and this just took the cake! :o( 7:00 came along. He didn't get home until after 7:00! He took the highway! I75. It took him that long to get home! Thats how bad it was getting and how it had gotten here! :o( Fast! They closed down interstate I70! Both West and East bound! I70 goes off of I75. I was a nervous wreck and a bundle of nerves!
I sat here not being able to do anything about my sister or my husband! I felt so helpless! :o( I made a little video of my back yard, but I haven't uploaded it yet. It was before all of this happened. In the video, you'll just see how much we got before it got worse! My car was covered. uuuhhh!
Well...today, things look a bit better. I'm glad, but it's still not very safe to be driving out there. And boy am I glad I got all of my errands done when I did!
It's 0 degrees out right now! I thought when it was this could, it was too cold to snow! lol well who ever told me that was way off base! lol :o)
If you could, please pray for my sister. She's lucky that she got out of that accident with just what she did. Thank you. ;o)
I need to go now. Going to try and up load that video. :o) Because I want to see whats in MY back yard! lol :o)
Thank you all for your comments and emails! Gods blessings to all of you! :o)

~A picture of my hair~

Here it is! :o) It's hard to see because I couldn't get the curls the way they were. :o) I should of had a good picture taken last night! :o) Plus sleeping on it didn't help much either! lol :o)
Well....thats my new do! :o) Love it! :o)

                                              Lisa