<sigh>

Hello all. I don't know if this was happening  to everyone today, but it the compuer wouldn't let me on to put an entry in. At least it's over for me.

If it's one thing or another...gggrrr! These illnesses can really knock you right on your ass!
One thing, I did wake up yesterday with a sore throught. I think I know why.
When my daughter and I went to WalMart, I had my hair up in a pony tail. It was also later in the evening as well. It never fails, I have my hair up, it's dark and a bit nippy out, and it gets me everytime. I should have known.
So, needless to say, I'm not feeling well.
Last night all I wanted to do was to just go to bed, and didn't record. This one is kind of ...I don't have a word to explain it. I sleep on the left side and I have a few things there. I remember pouring water on the bed! So, I had to change the bed. And the pains I was in just trippled. I didn't think I was going to make it. After that stint, I went back to bed. I woke up this morning laying on the right side of the bed, with the light on, and me laying there with a different tape in my camcorder! I looked as those it went to a certain place, I watched it and to me, I didn't see anything as in something that happened on my tape. I put the tape back into it's own case and put the tape that was already in it.
My bedroom is having fun with me. Well...the "others" that are here.
Like last night, I stayed awake. I'm probably going to do it tonight as well.
I'm going to tape again tonight and see if I get anything, with or without me being in there. I'm still going to show you them when I can. I have my air on in there and my oxygen tank is there and 3 fans all going. So it's kind of hard to hear. I also wish I knew how to "clean" them so you can hear better.
I was in so much pain earlier, I took some medicines and it knocked me out good! I so needed that sleep. And as you can tell, I'm up too late again.
I did take some pain pills and nothing has happened yet. They'll hit me here soon. Oh, what I wouldn't do for a shot of Demerol.Now that stuff really helps me.
I'm very worried about Madia. She sleeps alot and doesn't get up very offten like she should be doing. She hangs out with me during the day until dh comes home and then its him. I just hope I'm wrong.
My pains are getting a bit worse. This is my life...the rest of my life. And I'm only 44. Well my birthday is soon.
Have a good one! :o)

Lisa

 

Tags: Life, pains, fibromyalgia, MS, love, Blogplugs

what piece am I?

I would like nothing more to share with you, but as soon as I can fix my camera, You'll be the first ones to see.
One thing that I had on my mind today is if thats all I talk about is my pains and illnesses. I need to. I need to log.
In a way, it's like refreshing my soul. It really helps.

I'm still trying hard to figure out what is going on in my sleep. This is another different thing to go through. It's not sleep walking, it's not something that I'd be embarrassed about. I just wake up in the mornings to a thrown about room.
It's odd because I never seen it happen and to my knowledge no one comes into my bed room to do this.

The butterfly, in Native American culture, represents transformation and balance. This is a tough one for me in my life right now. I used to go out in the night and watch the animals coming from the sewers to find there food. In the morning and afternoon, go out in the sun work in my garden. I would rotate each year, veggies one time and then flowers the next. The soil was very fertile. Even the squills knew where to plant there peanuts. It was cute. To ground myself I would put my hands in the soil. It felt cool on my hands. I miss doing this. But, there is a way that I can feel the soil. It could be brought in the house for me.
I do know that I need a transformation. Butterfly, there are 4.
I tell myself that, "Oh, I just don't have the time." But I do have plenty of time. I just don't see it. I have so many projects that I've started, and need the love that I put in it.
Yesterday and the day before, I had to be in my wheelchair. The feeling of that, of "having" to do it makes you feel your life in such a different way. Things that I look at when I am standing, then when I'm in the wheelchair is so very different. I know that I feel like I need to stand up for someone/anyone to see me and hear me. Not so. It just comes to a matter of choice.
I am naturally a quit person. I'm not sure if that comes across or not. Yesterday my daughter was here with the kids.Kayden can do something...can't remember, sorry...but I tried it and couldn't do it. That upset my daughter.I told her last year when I did lose the things I could do with my fingers and hands.Its like, "Hey....I have hands, but can't use them properly." What I think it is, is she's never seen me not able to. It's like if, "Out of mind...". Then This morning I got a call from her letting me know how sorry she was that she couldn't help me more. I told her that shes got enough on her plate.
My mom is going to be my care giver. Shes past all the testing and now all she needs is number and shes in like flint! I know I'll be well taken care of. It will be about the same time that I'll have to be in my wheel chair more,and laying down and resting.
I had no idea how much I had written. If you got this far, thank you for listening to be. If not, I don't blame you! :o) I just have so much to say, but I don't know how to get it out and on the computer. I have to go......

Tags: Friends, Family, Love, Live, Life

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Uh...really?

Good afternoon. I do hope that everyone is doing/feeling great this beautiful day.

I posted the pictures that I took a few days back. I lost all of the videos and pictures. gggrrrr! I have plenty of time to get some more.
Thursday evening I felt good enough to go to wall mart. I needed to get something. I called my daughter and she said she could go with me. Whew! I drove to her house because she has a bigger car than I do to put the babies car seats in. On the way there, which isn't very far at all, I forgot what it was that I was going to Wal Mart for. I started to get upset. I just could not remember. It was a bit scary, because it could have been something I needed fast. I asked Nena if she remembered. She did and all it was was a tape holder for smaller tapes to watch them on tv instead of watching the movies in that little square! :o)
They had some and my tapes didn't fit. Nena held the container it came in and right on the front it said not for the use of_____! LOL Boy did I feel like an idiot!
I started to not feel right, and I even had a scooter to ride in. I had to get home quick. It was about 11:30 when I got home. :o) It felt so nice to get out. It had been raining here, and I wear my cowboy boots, because they are the only shoes I have to wear so I don't get all muddy. Dh was up waiting on me, so he could take them off of me. That was so sweet of him. Yep! My feet were swollen to the shape of my boots. Geesh! I thanked him and then we both went our seperate ways.
Thats another thing I bought, tapes for my camcorder. Duh! LOL I'm such and air head! lol Still trying to see What ever it was....going blank here! Oh, ok...I remember now. The activity I was having in my bed. I have 1 EVP tape and 3 Tapes with " something" eles doing things. I needed to get more tapes because "who ever" it is thats doing this stuff, I'd like to try and get a bit more information. This is very interesting.
In the last tape I did, I was having a seizure! I had to show it to Nena because I don't know what it looks like when I have them. She said that I was and to show it to my nurse. I'm going to.
I'm not "whining," but dam my whole body is killing me! I have muclse cramps everywhere, and I can barely walk. Yesterday I had to use the electric wheel chair. :o( My son and my daughter were here yesyerday. Boy do I really miss Jason. Oh well....he had to move out sometime! LOL
Well, I'm going to my room and try to relax. I was going to save my money for 4 days at the Comfort Inn Hot tub room.
Bye.

 

Lisa

 

 

Tags: Fibromyalgia,

~Calmness In Our Lives

I am passing this on to you because it definitely works and we could
all use a little more calmness in our lives. By following simple
advice heard on the Dr. Phil show, you too can find inner peace.

Dr Phil proclaimed, "The way to achieve inner peace is to finish all
the things you have started and have never finished."

So, I looked around my house to see all the things I started and
hadn't finished, and before leaving the house this morning, I finished
off a bottle of Merlot, a bottle of Zinfandel, a bottle of Bailey's
Irish Cream, a bottle of Kahlua, a package of Oreos, the remainder of
my old Prozac prescription, the rest of the cheesecake, some Doritos,
and a box of chocolates and the rest of my half-gallon of Blue Bell
Original Vanilla Bean ice-cream.

You have no idea how freaking good I feel right now!!

Tags: Humor, Joke, Laugh

~This and that

Not too much has happen since I last wrote. Well, that I'm able to write about.
Last night my pains woke me up. I was screaming and dh comes in to check on me. My hips were just killing me! I have been having a bit of time with them this past week. The night before last I did the same thing, but this time it was my shoulders. This just has to stop now! LOL :o)~

My daughter and her cute little family are fine....they went to see that new movie with Heath leadger. dh and I, (I really have a hard time with that) watvhed Kayden, and someone else watched Andrew. I'm glad they went and had fun. :o)
I am still taping me sleep so I can give it to my doctor. Well...Both of them have noices, people talking, someone waking on a wooden floor with heavy boots on. I want to figure out how I can edit them and put them on youtube. It was not at all what I expected to see or hear!  I've even had 2 things thrown at me while sitting in bed! I showed it to dh and he said that there is no way that it could have happen. This was a cup. And it came down to the same thing with the other. I don't know why all of this started in my room. Dh said that next weekend, he's moving me out of that room. I'm a person that it takes alot for me to be scared. Talking about the paranormal. Even that house we used to live in didn't scare me. I dread going to sleep in there. And I have no idea as to why.
My kids don't really beleive that it bothers me.
Last night...I prayed so many times. I know prayers will help.

I've also been sick. Blah! My daughter wanted us to go see that movie. And I had to decline. That was so hard for me to do. I can't really plan anything. That sucks.
I need to go...my legs and feet are swelling up once again. gggrrr

Tags: Paranormal, Pains, Pictures, Family

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~What a week.

Good morning everyone! I'm hoping that all of you are feeling great this lovely day.

I honestly don't know where to start from where I left off. :o) Well...I do have pictures and 1 video for now. I've been so busy that I could only upload only the one. :o)

I do hope you enjoy it. :o)
There is only one sentence that I can think of that this week has been, "God must really feel that I have very strong shoulders!" I've been working on getting my legs and feet down. So that leaves me in my bedroom. I watch BB afterdark, then what ever I've recorded. I did, however, record one of my favorite movies, Wuthering Heights! The original. Love it! :o) I had so many movies that I really needed to get off the dvr. Dh, got me 3 tapes and I think I need about 3 more! lol :o)

My doctor called me last week about those blood tests. It sugar was 249. She asked me if I've ever had it that high before. Ummm, Yep! Thats my "normal" blood take. It's even been over 300. So she said that she wants to monitor me! Um, how? lol Either she'd be here, or me in the hospital. Geesh! The appointment that I had the last time with her, I took my tablet and talking to me and dh that it was very clear that I do have diabetis. And what is she looking for now. lol Maybe she should go back to my files. :o)
This week, since I've been having activity in my bed and trouble sleeping at night...I dreed going to sleep! Thats not me! lol :o) My home health aide was here the next morning. I couldn't for the life of me remember how to put a tape in or take one out of my camcorder! So I asked if she could help me. I hooked it up to the t.v., and started to watch it and I told her that she can too, because I might miss something. Well, no, I didn't miss a thing! It's more like a paranormal tape then anything!!! No kidding! Even the camera was picked up and moved. You hear heavy foot steps on a hard wood floor, alot of knocking and all kinds of noises! I was so glad that she was here when I started it! LOL As soon as I can, I need to edit (because each tape is 2 hours and the time it took for me to flip the tape) it too much time between. And here I am in the background sleeping and not knowing whats going on! I had the setting to night vision.

We also noticed that there were time missing! Someone/thing had turned the camcorder off, looking at the blue, then back to me again. It did this on the next tape. I was up and remebered to turn the tape, so I had 4 hours. Well, so I though I did. There were alot missing from that one! I did it again last night. I didn't wake up through the night, so I have no idea as to whats on it. I'll let you know. :o)

My mood being as "Rebllious..." That came from my daughter. lol She came over this week with my grandsons and I don't know what I said or did, but she texted me when she got home and said she thinks I'm a rebel and she likes that! :o) I thanked her. lol I don't know if thats good are not. Thats my baby!
Well, I'm going for now....You Have a great day! :o)

 

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~The Bell

THE BELL

I KNOW WHO I AM
I am God's child (John 1:12)
I am Christ's friend (John 15:15)
I am united with the Lord(1 Cor. 6:17)
I am bought with a price(1 Cor. 6:19-20)
I am a saint (set apart for God). (Eph. 1:1)
I am a personal witness of Christ (Acts 1:8)
I am the salt & light of the earth (Matt.5:13-14)
I am a member of the body of Christ(1 Cor 12:27)
I am free forever from condemnation ( Rom. 8: 1-2)
I am a citizen of Heaven. I am significant (Phil.3:20)
I am free from any charge against me (Rom. 8:31-34)
I am a minister of reconciliation for God(2 Cor.5:17-21)
I have access to God through the Holy Spirit (Eph. 2:18)
I am seated with Christ in the heavenly realms (Eph. 2:6)
I cannot be separated from the love of God(Rom.8:35-39)
I am established, anointed, sealed by God (2 Cor .1:21-22)
I am assuredll things work together for good (Rom. 8: 28)
I have been chosen and appointed to bear fruit (John 15:16)
I may approach God with freedom and confidence (Eph. 3: 12)
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me (Phil. 4:13)
I am the branch of the true vine, a channel of His life (John 15: 1-5)
I am God's temple (1 Cor. 3: 16). I am complete in Christ (Col. 2: 10)
I am hidden with Christ in God (Col. 3:3). I have been justified (Romans 5:1)
I am God's co-worker (1 Cor. 3:9; 2 Cor 6:1). I am God's workmanship(Eph. 2:10)
I am confident that the good works God has begun in me will be perfected (Phil 1: 5)
I have been redeemed and forgiven (Col. 1:14). I have been adopted as God's child(Eph 1:5)
I belong to God
Do you know
who you are!?
'The LORD bless you and keep you;
the LORD make His face shine upon you
and be gracious to you;
the LORD turn His face toward you
and give you peace.'
Numbers 6:24-26