Just my feelings.

I just want to clarify something. I'm not being cynical in my latest writings. All I'm doing is writing down my feelings. Thats all. I'm loosing more of what I am able to do. My body has gotten worse, and I'm so afraid that I will loose being able to walk. I'm grieving a bit about that. But again, it is very true about not getting anymore phone calls, or any vistors because of their friend. In the eyes of them, I was a priority to them. It just hurts when I'm in need of them now, they aren't here for me. Again, I don't want anymore promises from anyone, because they have been broken. That hurts. For those that read my journal to see how I'm doing that live close to me, well, here it is; I'm in pain still and I will probably be in bed most of the day to rest my muscles. Yes, the pain is above a 10. There, now you know. What you don't know is what I haven't written. Things I can't write. Not my lose. Again, not being cynical, just my feelings.