Sad.

We had a member of our family pass away last night. :o( She hasn't been well for the past month, and her left hip was going out. Yesterday, her right hip went out on her, and wasn't able to get around. It progressed throughout the day, and then late last night, she passed. :o( The whole family is greiving. :o( But knowing that she is in heaven makes me feel better. She made such an impact on all of our lives. We will all miss her. She was in my prayers last night.

When God gives you something, like an illness that is not curable, you must make the best of your life. There are many changes that happen. As in things that you can no longer do. Which in my case, I already greived my losses, and have excepted what I have and moved on. I do what I am able to do now, which in my eyes, is better then not being able to do them at all. I am very grateful for that. However, writing about my life and what I go through with having this disease, has helped others to understand fibromyalgia a little bit more. I've meet knew friends that have fribo that I still keep in contact with. I don't feel that when I talk about my pain, and what I'm going through in my days are constant complaints. I would like to know from others that do have this disease if you think that this is a self indulged illnes? In my opinion, how can it be? And do you feel that I'm being selfish in writting about what I go through? I would love to hear from others. In my life, through every obsticle that comes along, I get through it, and move forward. I beleive if you don't, you will become stuck in a rut. I just ride the waves that come along. You have to live your life to the fullest. And that has always been my motto. I have faith in God, and I have put my health problems in His hands. I know He will take care of me and watch over me every second. My doctor has asked me to start a journal awhile back, (the reason I started this one) to help me get through this illness and to meet others like me as well. Since I am not able to write for a long period of time, Thats why I decided to have an on line journal. I'm an honest straight forward person, and I write my opinions on what is going on in my life. Which does not mean that I am complaining, Think I'm the only one like this, or not moving on with my life in a positive way. My doctor and my physical therapist are very proudof the way I'm dealing with this as well as everone else that knows me. I use this journal as therapy as well, and it helps.

All morning yesterday, I was calling about a scooter or a motorized wheel chair. I finally came across some good news. I have an appointment in February. I was down to 3 more phone calls, after going through 3 pages of numbers, and the help from the city's Manager. A break through! :o) I'm a person that will not stop to help myself. If you don't help yourself through things, then how would you expect others to help you? Thats how I feel any ways. I was raised that way, and to be honest and respectful to myself and others. I'm still going to call the others numbers to see their qualifications. But I do have a good feeling about the appointment. :o)

I also found out yesterday that we are not to go into our neighbors property. A policeman called me to let me know that our neighbors were very concerned that we might be doing this! I honestly couldn't beleive what I was hearing! We have no reason to do that, and no one has. I can't wait until this spring, because my husband would like to put up am 8 ft. fence! YAY! Then we can have our own little oasis! :o) I'd love that! :o) We do know that changes need to be made for a happier summer. It gets old after awhile hearing lies and words of anger and selfishness. What I truly need from others is support, not people that think I'm being selfish and negative. If you don't understand fibormyalgia, then you have no idea what it's like to live life with it with out the support from others that will put you down first, before helping.

God bless you all. :o)