Again, what a week this has been. I was very worried about my daughter and just felt so helpless because I couldn’t give her help. I gave her hugs and I love you’s but sometimes thats just not enough. I love her and the unborn baby too much for anything to happen to them. I think she’s better now knowing more about it. I pray she and the baby will be fine.
I’ve been getting my days all mixed up again. Geesh, how hard is it to keep track of!!! There are also so many other, "Just little" things as well. My memory isn’t working right still. I can remember the stupid little things and then the important stuff seems to evoperate! I’m really starting to feel helpless to myself as well. And with the 50 lbs. that I’ve gained...(water weight) it is really scaring me! There are times I just want to just sit and cry. I’m doing the right stuff on my end, I just need for my nurse and doctor to do theirs! Because as of right now, with the two of them NOT helping me...it’s put all of this water in me! I’m just so pissed about that! I’m NOT a statistic, I’m human! They don’t have to feel this or go through it so why should they help!
I finally had the chance to talk to dh. I told him that I’m having a major melt down and have been for almost a year now! I’m overwhelmed and I’m losing my dignity. I can’t take it if I’m diagnosed with anything more! I’m just so done! Dh doesn’t like to hear me talk like this, but this is how I do feel.
I’ve been doing what my doctor has told me and things are still happening. Life really sucks. I haven’t been on the computer like I used to be. I’m doing my best to keep my legs up.
~Bye