Sunday, December 30, 2007

9:48 AM - I don’t understand people at all!
Current mood: pissed off
Category: Life

Remember when I said that I really don't feel like writing in my aol journal anymore? Well, today you'll see why! I really don't like the way others treat you and "asumming" things about you that just are not true! It's really driving me crazy! It's like I said; I write for ME and not for anyone else! Is that too hard to understand? I honestly don't know how else I can say it! It just sucks!
This one person is "always" doing this same shit with me and I'm so fed up with her anticks! She does this all the time to me, but has never left a comment like she did to me, she usually writes me an email! She claims that I have her blocked from emailing me, I was going to copy and paste "ALL" of who I have blocked, but it wouldn't let me. But I had a lot of emails from her this morning when I logged on! hhmmmm, I wonder how she emailed me if she was blocked? I just can not take all the bullshit anymore that goes along with the stupid aol journals! And I don't understand when others will tell me..."Just go private!" NO! I'm NOT going to let anyone rule me and my life! Ever! Especially someone on line that has nothing better to do!
And yes, I am still sick. I don't understand why I haven't gotten any better. This is really concerning me! It's been over a month now. None of the 4 antibiotics have helped me at all, which I find strange, at least one of them would have. The only thing thats working is this liquid I take to break up my chest. That stuff started working the same day I started taking it! Cool!
On top of all that, my body is doing it's own thing once again! I don't know how long this relapse is going to be this time. Of course, I never know.
After taking some deep breathes and walking around the house a bit....I'm starting to feel better. Calming down a bit.
And the weird thing is....when I write stuff like I did this one comments in them, except a few, Like Guido. And everyone talks so much about how J-land is supposed to be so helpful to you and supportive! I'd love to see that one! I've seen it with the others that have cancer. Not trying to be crass, just stating what "I've" seen. And guess what....I'm a cancer serviver! At the age of 23 is when I had to have a full hysterectomy because of indometriosis that I had and on the out side of my uteris, cancer was starting to grow. I've thank God for letting me live. Plus being able to have my kids. It did take awhile until I got better,  but I did get better! Thank God for that!
I'm leaving now....not feeling so good right now..ick!


Currently listening :
Abbey Road
By The Beatles
Release date: 25 October, 1990





my78novata said...

dont let a few get you down. I know its hard but dont let em

imgr8phil said...

All I have to say is just block this person from contacting you if they are upsetting you so much.  Why let them in at all.  If they can't take a hint then get rid of them yourself.  Take care.


pharmolo said...

Sometimes, Lisa, the best course of action in a situation like you portrayed this morning is a dignified silence. Particularly if you're unwell, I'd flatly ignore. Life's too short, yanno?

cuteallison1980 said...

I'm sorry you are so sick and that someone is bothering you.  Try not to let that bother you and concentrate on your health.  You don't need to waste time worrying about other people like that.  It is taking energy away from what is important.  I'm worried about you.  I wish you would get to feeling better.  I wish there was something I could do for you.  Try to have a positive day Lisa.  Luv ya!


preciousone25 said...


abaleman666 said...

i am sorry another blogger was like that to you.  i read you occasionally and cant see what you could ever say to make anyone feel the need to be so abusive so there must be something very very wrong with that person.  let her come bother me now. . .i had a similar experience with a 'superfan' but no where near as negative as yours has been.  she/ he or whomever needs to get a life.  i am with you, i write for me, and to hell with what it does or doesnt do for anyone else.

take care and blog on,

buggieboo1 said...

Sorry this person upset you so much! just block this person from contacting you , that is what I do!


ldybutterfly1128 said...

Hey Lisa,

Just stumbled upon your journal today and read what you had to say.  You should never let anyone, especially some unknown jerks, get to you like that.  They probably do it just because they know you get ticked off.  People like that aren't worth the time or energy.  

I can tell you, with your health situation the way it's not good to get yourself all worked up.  Stress is never good for diseases that effect the central nervous system.  Stress isn't good for anything.  My husband has stage IV colon cancer.  Believe me, I've witnessed some of what you are going through with a chronic illness.  My heart goes out to you.  It is difficult to watch when someone you love has one problem after the next.

Take care of yourself.  And remember, if this journal is being written just for your sanity and to give you a purpose...let it serve you well.  Don't focus on the small minded people of this world.  A lot of us out here are pretty loving and supportive.

God Bless,


malagutigrrl said...

Try not to get yourself so stressed over someone who is obviously an asshole.  You know what stress does to us MSers and it's not good.  Worried about you over there.  Try ignoring the situation maybe.  Maybe the fact that it's all upsetting you is what fuels her fire.

lanurseprn said...

You've got a couple of choices here. Block whoever it is that is offending you and ignore them. Go private. Or close this journal up completely. You could start another journal on another website and leave AOL.
Seems to me those are your choices to avoid getting so upset.
Take care,

hugsdoodlewacky said...

((((((((((LISA))))))))))))))))))I hope you dont leave aol,because I would miss you so much.I have had people like that get me down alot.I finally had to justlet it go.You have to find it in your heart to let this go,for the best of you and your health.You have so many people who care and love you.

geocachelinda66 said...

That person takes sick pleasure in upsetting you.  If you see e-mails from her, just delete them.  I know its hard, I would want to see whats in them.  I have a part of me that likes conflict.  Don't copy and paste your blocked list for her, it will just give her more ammo to hurt you.  Linda

mosie1944 said...

Delete all negative stuff immediately.  Don't give them another thought.  And enjoy your journal.  Remember, there are ten times more people reading your journal than are commenting.  They support you.  They're just too intimidated to comment.

tsalagiman1 said...

Lisa, I don't understand them either.  But, it's probably better that we don't!  I know this is so cliched, but you do have to consider the source.  As a previous commenter said, the good people here by far outweigh the gutless cowards who hide behind the internet.  But, you hit the bottom line:  this journal is for you and no one else.  You just give us the privilege of sharing it with us.  Thank you for that privilege.


su2rfree said...

Sera. boy do I know what your talking about!  My RA has been raging for 2 weeks and when you have to deal with people who have no compassion and struggle to keep your diseases from consuming you, something has to give.  More often than not it is our emotions!  You have something I don't, a loving family to lean on!  My daughter is so good to me but she is in Texas and the family I have here pretty much think I am dog doodoo.  I try so hard to be helpful and loving and kind and cripe, I have a Dad and 2 sisiters that can't find one good thing to say about me!  now, it's all smoke and mirrors and what I mean is that when I am around them I get the sickening sweet act and later I here the hateful smut that's said behind my back!  Tried and tried to confront that head on but it's just like the old saying "you can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink".  It's heart breaking for me.  Those I call my "dark days"  where I feel like a sqare in a round hole.  You, you are doing good, your defiance keeps you strong!  For me, sometimes I just feel wore down and struggle with knowing that I have a divine purpose for being here that is way beyond my own comprehension!  You, you help me hold on, I can tap into that strength for an extra boost of hope!  Thank you Sera, I need that so much right now, thank you for being so strong!  Mari

merry1621 said...

Lisa, Sorry you feel that you are being misunderstood and treated unfairly. That is an awful way to feel.  I will just say what I have said before. Many many people love your journal and only a few say uintrue things.  Don't let the few get to you.  I know it's easier said than done.  But stay as positive as you can, it will help all your ailments.  Lisa, most people do care about you or your journal wouldn't get so many comments.  Remember that.  You only have to account to one person and that is God.

psychfun said...

Why get all upset over one person...tons in the world!

springangel235 said...

Wishing you the best in 2008 Journal wise and health wise deserve the best.  Happy New Year to you and your lovely family...hugs and love always,

ajquinn354 said...

Lisa wishing you a Happy New Years dear.  Let the past go, delete the messages of those who upset you.  Nothing is more important than your well-being and being stressed out only aggravates your health problems.  It takes a lot of strength when you are having health difficulties and how you feel mentally can make such a difference dear.  Allow yourself to let the past go, enjoy each new day of 2008.  Bless you. Arlene (AJ)

cgferrer71 said...

Im sorry your not feeling better. You would think all that medicine would help. Your Journal caught my eye and I just hope that you continue writting for yourself. And If anyone writes you in a negative way, I urge you not to even open it. That is really sad when people do this. It makes it hard to write how you feel when you think someone might critisize you for it. I stopped writting and I am starting up again. It got to be alot of work, and I was swamped with Homework after starting college again. But before I deleted my Journal, I printed everypage and put it in a binder. Its great to look at because I write more freely and all the added picks makes it extra special. I regreted stopiing,So please keep writting and know that that
1 % doesnt rule you and 99% of us want to support you. I hope you keep writting..