Wednesday, August 17, 2005

:o(

Yesterday I went to see my doctor that treats me for this horrid disease. Again, I had to use my wheel chair. :o( This time the doctor actually got to see and feel my muscle "lumps" that pop out from underneath my skin. It grosses me out to be able to see them and to feel them that way. :o( He took me off the Vicodine and the Tylenol 3, and put me on another new pain medicine. I asked about Demerol, and he said no, I needed something stronger! I started getting a bit scared. Well, I'm now on Oxycontin! I have to take it twice a day! :o( I took the first pill last night right before I went to bed, and I got 7 and 1/2 hours of sleep. This morning when I got out of bed, I could still see and feel all of the "lumps" and the other cramping, but I can't feel them! It doesn't make any since to me, but it is helping me to be able to get around better. The weird thing is that I "can" still feel the pain, but not. It's hard to explain this feeling. I just took my second pill, I have to make sure that I take them 12 hours apart. So, I'll find out what it will do to me during the day. It's just the oddest feeling. But good too. So hard to explain this. :o) God bless everyone. I so hope that no one else out there will ever feel the way I've been feeling. I would never want that. Very gentle hugs to all. :o)

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