Sunday, November 25, 2007


We watched our grandson tonight. I missed him so so much. I love that boy with all my heart. My daughter and her husband went to see a movie.
Dh and Kayden were on the floor playing cars. That was cute to watch. He also drew a picture for pawpaw too.
Then we went in my bedroom. I have another t.v. in there as well. It's an older one that I've had for years. Dh put an antenia on it and I can get 2 channels. They're the ones I watch anyways. But, we sat there watching t.v. together. Then he layed back on his pillow and wanted me to do the same. So cute. We watched Extreme Make-Over. He would clap for the people on t.v. It was so nice to get to spend such quality time with him like that. Dh agrees.
When they brought him here, he hadn't had anything for dinner yet. So I fixed him some chicken sticks and applesauce. Dh and I sat at the dinner table with him. He didn't eat a thing. That upsets me when I know he's hungry and doesn't eat. He did eat some of my chicken though, which made me feel better. He was thirsty alright. He downed to cups of juice. Wow.

I have a few things on my mind that still upsets me. Maybe someday I'll be able to talk about them. I know I really need to because it's a huge stresser on me. I took a nap as well earlier. My daughter and my grandson woke me up. Thats something so nice to wake up to.

I know I was having a nightmare when I was woken up. I can't remember what it was about because I didn't wright it down. The above graphic kind of reminds me of how I've been fighting myself, if that makes sense. It's hard to fight your own mind and body. There are times that I wish either I can exchange for a new body, or find Jack Kavorkian. I can actually feel my brain not wanting to work. And of course my body. And then the fight to keep them together and in tune with one another is the tricky part.
I turned off my medicine reminder tonight. I've been sleeping so much lately and since dh will be going back to work, I won't be able to hear it go off. If it goes off for 20 minutes, they call the paramedics to the house. I don't want that to happen. When I turned it off, the other machine went off. Someone came on and asked me if I knew that it was off. I told them yes and what has been going on. She was very nice about it and understood. I'm glad that they are so fast.
I've been having accidents more often lately as well. My bowls and my blader. Not fun. So, dealing with that now. Oh yay.

I think it's cute when my grandson see's that mawmaw uses diapers too. His reaction is adorable.

I'm up late because of the things on my mind. After I get done writing this, I'll go play some games on Pogo.
When I walked into the living room tonight, the Christmas tree was put up. That was so nice of them to do that for me. They know how I am. I also have a white dear that has lights on it and moves its head. Dh put that up too. Amazing. Since we have a grandson and another on the way, he's really into Christmas now. I love that, because I'm always into Christmas and decorating the house. My son said he's going to put the lights out on the front porch and the back deck tomorrow for me too. Wow. I will of course take pictures.

I can't wait to be able to go shopping. This year is going to be the worst year yet with money. Dh still hasn't got the money back (something personal) that he paid out. That was suppose to be our money to Christmas shop with. Bummer big time. All we were going to shop for was just Kayden. But, now the fun of that is gone.

Please sign my guest book.

It doesn't take that long.

Also, since I didn't get any emails, no one wants me to send a Christams card?

Well, I'm gone for now.



hugsdoodlewacky said...

((((((((((((((((((((LISA))))))))))))))))))))))))If you ever need to talk or just vent,you know you can email me anytime.I love it when your Grandson comes to visit you,He always put a smile on your face.I already have your addy.Your Christmas Card will be on the way soon.I know I asked if anyone wanted to a card and I got no replys.LOL.Have a good night.

lisa41076 said...

Lisa, I am glad your grandson and daughter came to visit, I plan on sending you a card, you will recieve it soon ok, Love You Lisa

sugarsweet056 said...

I would love to send cards, but don't have money for the stamps, I found out that get quite expensive when I did the Post Card exchange last year!
I wear the thick pads for urinary accidents, have for a couple yrs. Would use the diapers, but they don't make them in my size.
Have a good week.

lanurseprn said...

I tried to find your guest book and I can't find it. Maybe it is so  late in the night for me Hmmmmm...?
Glad you had a good visit with your family. Take care of yourself Lisa,
Pam xoxoxox

my78novata said...

ah hate that your feeling so bad. you should share about teh stuff but only after you go private and you need to do that. Its helped many friends.

helmswondermom said...


kamdghwmw said...

I am so glad that you and your grandson had a nice visit. I want to get my tree up this week, so we will see how I am feeling.

jmoqueen said...

Glad you had a good time with your grandson.  Bless him :)  It's good that that woman was nice and understood why you had turned it off!!  Hope the xmas decorations and lights make you feel a bit happier xx


gehi6 said...

Nice to read about your evening with your grandson.  You can just see from how he plays with you guys he has been a loved child from birth and that has given him such confidence and cuteness.  It is so nice to see this, because it means many days of attention to a chiild.  I do think that children do so well who are really treasured starting out in life.  My oldest son Gary was so treasured by so many people.  He was loved far and wide.  But he also suffered more at his father's hands who had strange ideas about how to be a father.  He was nicer to the second boy Raymond, so Raymond was able to form a deep relationship with him in his adult years that Gary never did.  I am going to resume writing my memoirs so I will be talking about that.  I decided I needed to do that, and what better place to get some reaction than online?  Hope you are able to resolve more of your issues as you go along   Gerry

ajquinn354 said...

Lisa all you can do is take it one day at a time, hopefully you'll have more good then down days.  So glad your grandson was over and spent those precious moments with you, know he brings you so much joy. With things tough for Christmas shopping, just get one gift for each if you can, time and sharing are more important then tons of of the most precious gifts you could give everyone is to write them a note telling them what they mean to you, know I'd take that any day over a bought gift. Instead of you sending cards to folks since things are tough, drop a note to your journal readers who you know truly care about you and let us send you a card.  Take care dear.....Arlene  

wwfbison said...

I'm glad you had a good time with your little grandson, I'm sure that makes you feel better while he's there anyway.  Take care of yourself.

ceilisundancer said...

Ah, the tree is up!  That's fantastic:)  We helped put up my mother/stepfather's tree this weekend.  I'm sorry that you're having more incontent troubles.  I suppose sometimes things are as they are.

I don't have nearly as much online time as you do, blessing or curse, and can't always read your posts.  I try to when I can:)  May today be a good one.

heavenlybama said...

I'm so glad you got to spend time with Kayden.  I had to say the hardest goodbye in my life Monday am when my 3 mo. old nephew went back home to MI.  I won't see him again until May.  He'll be 9 mos. old then.  Do u still have my addy?  I have yours.
Love ya,