Saturday, September 11, 2004

Still not very good :o(

I'm so glad that today is Saturday. Because my husband is home. I am not very well again today! Uugghh! What woke me up again this morning was pain! This time pain in my left elbow. I had a very hard time even moving my arm! Then when I moved to get up, it then was my left knee, my back, and my hips. I felt like a turtle on it's back! I couldn't get up. I layed there for almost an hour before I could even move enough to get out of bed! Thats pretty bad! I have a web site that I would like everyone that reads this journal, to go to and try it. It's what I go through in my days. I wish there were more on that site, but, it is just enough to be in my world for a few minutes.

Click on the link, and please go to it! Or, copy the link, and paste it in your web browser. I would appreciate it if everyone would try it. If this morning is a glimps of what today is going to be for me, I wish I could just go away, and not come back. I woke up at 4 :35. I got out of bed at 5:30! I was on line checking my mail at 7:00! Gee, what a slow morning. I only hope that my left arm will not stay the way it is! Or go on to the right arm. Wearing my sling doesn't even help it. :o( All I want is one day to be "normal" again. I would do so much in just the 24 hours I would have! I know I wouldn't sleep! I would just do everything I used to be able to do! :o) But, it will never happen. Just in my dreams it does. :o( Thats all I have left, my dreams. Better then nothing I suppose. I'm grieving the loss of the use of my legs and my hips and legs right now. It's so hard to describe to someone the loss of your hips. Who would imagine what your hips really do for you. A lot more then you think. They help you walk. So does your legs. Just don't take anything for granted. I used to. I look back now, and ask myself why did I ever in my life, do such a thing! You should praise God for what you have! You don't realize what you have, until you loose it. Just stop taking things for granted! Please! Even me, I thank God every morning for being alive, even if i'm on my back for almost an hour! I can still breath! One day, He might just take that away as well. But, until then, I thank Him. I'm done for now.

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