Monday, December 27, 2004

Finally able to sleep!

Last night, I was finally able to get more then 2-4 hours of sleep! I had 8 hours! YAY! That should help my pain level today. Should. Again....I wasn't feeling very well yesterday. The pain kind of makes you feel kind of "not well" after awhile, and thats how I felt yesterday. Everything was hurting, and it drained me of all my strength. I still feel alone. I try to have converstions with others, and all I can say is, "Yes...I used to do that!" Used to. Not, "Yes, I do that." No...I don't know what anyone is talking about anymore. But I have good memories of how I "used" to do the things they talk about. Years ago. The closes that I think that everyone that lives in this house, that got a taste of what it's like to be me, was when everyone was snowed in on Thursday! It was just a normal day for me. Everyones days were all mixed up, and they said how much they hated having to stay home all day! Gee...I know that feeling! I even said, "Now you know how I feel." That was like I had just opened up a can of worms! My bad! was different! Was it? Nope! Then I heard, "I'm not complaining, but I really hate being stuck in this house for so long!" Really? That changed the meaning by saying, "I'm not complaining?" Nope! I don't to them. In fact...they don't even know what I write in this journal. This journal is my outlet. When I write in it, I don't feel so all alone.

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