Thursday, January 25, 2007

......and so on in the life of the flesh of Lisa.

Good morning! I hope all are doing well this morning.
As you know, I posted that I had an appointment to see my neurologist yesterday morning.
The good news is I do not have Stiff Person Syndrome. :o) know how your vitals are taken, my blood pressure, tempreture, reflexes...etc... Everything was fine, except for my reflexes in my arms and legs...I didn't have any! :o( He kept hitting harder. I didn't even feel it. He asked me if I've felt anything different since I've seen him last, which was 3 months ago. I told him yes. About a month ago, I remember writing in here about feeling someting very different and didn't know if it had anything to do with the fibro or what. Plus, not being able to raise my arms for a long period of time to brush my hair or even to wash it. And I told him how hard it's been for me to walk, and what I was doing. Using my heating pad and my heating blanket. And told him where It was bothering me the most, my lower back, hips and legs.

Well....he then looked in my eyes with that little bright light and the had me do some had and finger tests. Then had me walk with my cane for him. Then to sit back up on the bed. I thought I did good! NOT! I really like this doctor alot, he has such a great attitude and is on top of things. He had already checked my arms and legs and such. He was very thorough. He then told me that I've already lost my muslce abilities in my legs and my arms! :o( It had already started! He actually hung his head, then looked up at me and said, if it hadn'd already been as bad as it is now, he could have done something for me! :o( He did order me another EMG test in a few weeks. I have to go back down to Middletown for it becuase he says he wants to do the test himself to see for himself what's going on.

I am very overwhelmed with all of this right now. I'm also very upset as well. I'm grieving of my lose. :o( Soon, I  will be a quad. I pray that Extreme Home Make Over will help me. I talked to my family about what's going on with me, and what I need to happen around the house. And that I'm going to very soon need their help. Well, I alread need help with my hair, and a few other things.
This morning around 1:30, I had a nightmare. My daughter and my husband woke me up! I guess I was crying and screaming and throwing things like my pillows. The only thing that I can remember about what I was dreaming about was someone was strapping me in a wheel chair and I was fighting them off. Oh well.
I also haven't been around to your journals, I just need to take a break right now. Please don't take it personally. I feel like screaming right now. I've been trying to think of something to laugh about, but I can't come up with anything right now. Oh well. Just please pray for me and put me on your prayer lists. Thank you. This is just pretty hard to swallow.
Thank all of you for your supportive comments, and Gods blessings to all of you!


my78novata said...

{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}} it must be so scary for you right now

queeniemart said...

you are always in my thoughts and prayers. LOVE YOU,

newmomtobe2001 said...

OmG lisa, I am so sorry to hear that please take care I will keep you in my prayers love vicky

dca721 said...

Maybe you will get better news after test.
I will pray for you.
Love you girl,

sugarsweet056 said...

If you don't have SMS then what do you have?
Maybe after the test he'll have better news for you.
Don't be too down, be happy you're alive & have a loving supportive family.
Prayers going up!
Huigs, Sugar

pharmolo said...

Very sorry to hear that things are going in the wrong direction. It's one thing losing the abilities in your limbs, quite another to be plagued with excruciating pain alongside. Words cannot take pain or distress away, but a grief shared is a grief halved. Don't worry about calling round journals - you're top priority now for you.


millieukgirl said...

(((Lisa))) you're in my thoughts sweetie, Millie.

fibfatigue said...

OH, hun, I am so sorry!  I can't even imagine how you must feel right now.  Seeing your mood as: sad made me sad, because I know with everything you've been through you have still managed to smile and be happy.  You are such a special person.  I wish I could take this all away for you.  I am glad you are having another EMG.  I am happy you have such a supportive family.  Let them take care of you for a while.  I know it's hard, but you need a break.  Thank you for your letter.  I know how hard that must have been to have to put that in writing.  You have so much courage.  It just amazes me.  (((((Lisa))))))
I am sending you prayers daily, often many times daily.  I'm so fortunate to have you as my friend.  

nhd106 said...

I don't have any of the right words...Just know that I, and many others will be thinking of you.


kamdghwmw said...

I am sure that your family will pitch in and help. I know that everything will work for you! I will send up a prayer for you.

lisa41076 said...

Awwwwwwwwwww Lisa, keeping you in my prayers always, Hugs Lisa

rainy35 said...

You're in my thoughts and prayers Lisa!

dbaumgartner said...

Sweetie you are in my thoughts and prayers!!!!  You keep up the fight that I know you have inside of you.  Just deal with today and make the most of what is there for you!!!!


klconard1 said...


lanurseprn said...

OMG he actually said you would be a quad??  I'm so sorry Lisa. I don't know what to say.  Just keeping you in my prayers.

hugsdoodlewacky said...

(((((((((((((((((((((((LISA)))))))))))))))))))))Your in my orayers.I feel like screaming myself right now.

sweetestsin52605 said...

I love you mommy!! Yea you were scaring me..I was like aww mom is whimpering..made me sad. :) Love ya

redpoppy007 said...

I hope he is wrong and they can help you.