Sunday, January 28, 2007

~A part of life~


Good morning/afternoon. I do hope that everyone feels alright. I really have a few things on my mind this morning, actually....from yesterday! I just kept it in for a bit to try to make some sense out of it!
I can't come up with any! And I don't know really what to think. I do know I should have kept my mouth shut about the insurance! I seem to always talk too much about something! I had no idea that it took that long. No one told me. I'm very grateful for all that everyone has done...please don't get me wrong. I just didn't know. :o) I don't want to put one in, and waste money if they're going to come and tear it out.

Moving on.......


Yesterday my husband was working on this computer to try to make it so that I can be on my laptop and on line with the cable hook-up as well. So, I was on and off most of the day. He just got back from Staples, and I see that I'm going to be on and off again. ;o) He found what he needed to be able to hook it up for me. :o) So, when I'm not able to get out of bed, I can still be on line! :o) That will be so nice. ;o)
Well....I didn't get to bed until 4:00 this morning and got up at 8:00! Here we go again! I'm wondering if it's going to be that routine, or just a fluke. Hopefully a fluke! Pain is what woke me up, so I'm betting my money on a fluke. :o) I've got another headache, but thats all it is, no migraine! Whew! :o) Gotta think positive here!

My daughter and her boy friend took our grandson to see Disney on ice today! :o) He's going to just love that! I can't wait to see the pictures when they get home! :o) I'll post them of course! :o) He loves things like that!
I'm sure you've might have noticed that I've made some changes to my side bar! :o) I've met someone that has inspired me so much! :o) I know that our paths were meant to cross! :o) At least for me anyway! :o) Plus, I've been talking to an old friend of mine as well! :o) I really missed her. :o) She's doing great! :o) I would love tomeet the person that has inspired me so much! :o) I just can't believe how much we have in common! :o) Pretty cool! lol :o)
In my life right now, I just am feeling like I need to do things now! I don't want to wait! I just have this feeling that I can't wait deep inside me....so I want to do the things I have planned...like soon! :o) If I'm making any sense? :o) I am to me.....if I want to do or say something, I'm going to, because sometimes the truth hurts! I just have this nonchalant feeling. This is my life, and I'm going to start living it the way I want to, not the way someone else thinks/feels the way I should, or to comform to what they think/feel the way they want me too! No more of that BS! I have a life....and I'm going to live it my way! :o) To bad if no one likes it! Just go jump in a lake if you don't like what I write or what I do!
Moving on........
I know if any of you were walking/standing in my shoes right now, and lived my life for 1 week...I could bet you all the money in the world that you would have such a way different opinion and a different outlook in your own life! :o)
I just say whats on my mind and don't hide behind a false life, and tell it like it is, in the best way that I can to get it across to all on how it's like to have what I do have and how it feels! And right now, My head feels like I have a rubber band around it! I don't know why! Yes, I keep wanting to take my hand and try and pull this "nothing" off of my head! My back....It feels like I have steal jagged rods sticking in my spine! And it hurts! I want someone to take them out! That "nothing" thats in my spine! My upper arms feel like they are cut and just layed opened to where you are able to see the bone! And the muscles are torn and ripped to shreds and I'm bleeding to death! I really want to have someone to sew up my arm, because that "nothing" is really killing me! My upper chest feels the exact same way as my upper arms do! And my thighs, the both of them feel like they have been slashed many many times, all around on them! Stabbed very deeply! And they have not been bandaged up yet! Or none of the knives have been taken out! They are so very weak because of this. Please take those "nothing" out for me and make it better! My hips feel like the bones have been carved on! I need them to be replaced! Please help me replace the "nothing" thats there! My calves feel like they're going to explode! Both of them are so swollen right now! Why? Like tight balloons! If I move the wrong way, they might burts! Help them! Help me get that "nothing" out of them! My feet feel like the bottoms have rocks and pebbles! It hurts so badly to walk on them! OUCH! I have to get the "nothing" out of the bottoms of my feet so I can walk better! They hurt so bad! :o( My hands are still cramped up in the shape of a "C"! They both hurt so bad! I can't write with them! The muslces in them are so cramped up! I need help to get inside of them to pull out the "nothing" in them to make them better again! Don't just stand there........Help me! PLEASE!!!

21 comments:

sugarsweet056 said...

You know I can feel for you dear, I keep you in my prayers, praying for some relief from the pain.
Hugs, Sugar

dca721 said...

Hi Lisa,
I understand.
I'm sorry you are in such pain.
Love,
Donna

lanurseprn said...

Will keep you in my prayers.
Pam

hugsdoodlewacky said...

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katie39041 said...

Wouldnt life be great if we had no nothings.But thats not the case and we live our lifes with nothings.believe me if i could take all those nothings so my friend wasnt suffering i would. great news about your new hook up. Just think you can sit in bed with a warm pad and type away. while the rest of us freeze our butts off. lol
love and hugs
katie xx

barbpinion said...

((((((((LISA))))))))))))) LIfe can get so hard sometimes. And I know it seems much harder when we are in a lot of pain. It is good that you're taking control of your life. It is, after all, YOUR LIFE! Why shouldn't you express yourself, and live it as you want. So sorry you are in such pain. I really am, honey. Pray for you, all the time.
Hugs
Barb- http://journals.aol.com/barbpinion/THERESTOFTHESTORY
        http://journals.aol.com/barbpinion/HEYLETSTALK

stevietwain said...

Stay strong hun...*hugs*
I can only imagine how it must be for you, but your body doesn't control your soul, and what a lovely soul it is too!!

So glad to know you,

Lv Ste
xxx

emabecmar said...

today is a day of pain for me also. every bone and muscle is hurting me. walking too hard today. I couldn't even take rebecca to the toy store for a new story book today cause i hurt so much. i do hope things are better for you soon. (((((((((hugs)))))))))
Cindy

jckfrstross said...

Hang in there:) have the docs ever mentioned Kadian for your pain? it doesn't take it away (pain) but help bring it to a level you can deal with:) have a good week


Deb

fibfatigue said...

Right back at ya!  I'm sorry you didn't sleep again.  If you're ever up late, write me, and I will write back if I am too. You are very special to me also.  Thank you for supporting me, and putting those icons in.  PS. Check your inbox.  I have good news.  I have found lots of support (you know where), but you'll always be my number one! I hope you are resting now.  Thinking of you!
With much love,
Me :)

kamdghwmw said...

That is so cool that your husband is trying to make it so you can be on line and in bed at the same time! I am sorry that you are not feeling good. I know that it will get better for you!
Kelli
http://journals.aol.com/kamdghwmw/noonmom

my78novata said...

glad youll be online even if you cant get out of bed. Saw your baby sitting pics nad read the other entries. I love the one after the pics about being created for a reason. I dont see why you should have been quiet aout the insurance money I think it was a good thing

jmoqueen said...

You should say what you want and how you feel and more power to you :)  That's great that your hubby is hooking it up to the bedroom.  I'm so jealous, I wish I had a laptop in the bedroom, but then I'd just become more lazier lol

Jenny

http://journals.aol.co.uk/jmoqueen/MyLife

newmomtobe2001 said...

I wish I could love v

rdautumnsage said...

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lisa41076 said...

Lisa, glad you will be able to have your laptop in your bedroom, bet your grandson loved Disney On Ice , Hugs Lisa

queeniemart said...

i hope that today you are painfree and have a good day.
love,lj

queenb8261 said...

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gehi6 said...

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sweetestsin52605 said...

haha working on the computer was sooo much fun mom!! shall we do it again soon?!? lmao..NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. Its not like we are computer illiterate like some..lol.

sweetestsin52605 said...

ok question...if it takes 2-3 years..then how come we ALL had to do the video RIGHT NOW and turn it in quickly?!  But if it takes that long, and none of us knew about it until NOW, why didn't anyone say it took that long?! Rhonda, bless her heart, made a video on your behalf and sent it in too. In 2-3 years from now, I don't think we will all be living here anymore..but we will see..but I am not sure. Jason will be like 27/28 and I will be 25/26. Hmmm...sounds weird to me. Anywho..I hope it is sooner than that for your sake mom. I want to find out how they know it takes this long..I am going to research it. If it takes that long, than GEEZ! Might as well re-do it our selves..lol. Anywho...love ya and night!