Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Just alittle more! :o)

.....Just to let you know, nothing in this journal's entry is toward anyone in specific, I use it to write my feelings, and about my illnesess,and in hopes it might help someone else as I do. And if you might take an entry wrong and feel that it is about you, I'm sorry but It isn't, it just may seem to coincide with your own life. God bless you!......



Good afternoon! I hope that all is well today! :o) It's suppose to be hot here today...but we did have some pretty nice and cool weather. :o) That did give me a nice break for awhile. ;o)

Photobucket was giving me a hassel earlier...so no grapics today. ;o)

I'm having alot of fun scanning pictures! lol I'm sure you can tell! :o) I shared what pictures I do have of my biological father. And the rest of the pictures I have. I met him right after  had my daughter in 1985. I'd love to really know more about this side of my family...especially about medical! Thats very important to me because my doctor has told me that alot of my illnesses has come from my father! So...I've tried calling him and asking, but...didn't get very far! :o) Oh well. :o)

In the pictures of me....it shows how I was naturally thin. Which my matabolism was high...I couldn't gain weight.
It was when I was 15...when my mom said to me," When I get older, she see's me getting fat!" That I felt as a teenager was pretty devastaing to hear! I was trying to gain wait and I hear this from my mom! What? Thats when I became what is now known as anorexic!
I've been struggling with this disease ever since! It will always be in the back of my head....it does not go away! The eating part! Yes...since then...my mom and I have talked about all of this and she of course didn't realize that just by saying what she did would put me in such a state. Well...neither did I! Who does? It happened!
I did get the help I needed. But...I still struggle every single day of my life with eating! I guess it's like drinking. I don't know. My weight gain now is because of my medicines. What I look like now is what I seen in the mirror when I was 15! I know alot of the tricks and how to be sneaky to get out of eating. It's easier then you think. And it all came from an innocent comment.

Today....my daughter and my grandson is coming over!!!! A big YAY!!! :o) I can't wait! :o) More pictures! lol :o) I haven't seen them in a week! :o) Thats a long time for me...I'm having withdraws! ;o)

I want to thank all my new readers! ;o) Thank you for all of your kind words. ;o)
I need to get going! :o) Gods blessings to you all! :o)



my78novata said...

I love seeing you as  child and growing up. Your not a dork and you do look  a bit like your aunt. I love taht sllly face

dca721 said...

Hi Lisa,
I am happy you will see your daughter and grandson today.
I know how much you love them.

ajsproudparents said...

I hope you have a great visit with your daughter and grandson. I know my mom loves when we come by. LOL now that we are living here again maybe shes getting tired of us LOL
Either way, I hope you have a wonderful day hun!
Take care

sugarsweet056 said...

Photobucket has been doing that a lot latley!!!! I had to put my graphics in per AOL today on Furr Babies.
I hate having an eating disorder, anorexia, bilemia, or morbid obrsity (which I have). It's so hard, & most people don't understand it.
Have a delightful day & TY for the BD wishes.

merry1621 said...

Lisa, I was one of those naturally thin people. And I was such a runner, and a swimmer, and a go-er and a do-er, I thought I'd always be tiny.  Instead, I am regular. But I know what it's like to live by the scale.  For 50 + years.  I wouldn't eat if the scale went over 100 lb.  I still have that voice in my head, so I know what you mean.  

You do favor your aunt!

I can't imagine not knowing your own father.  My Dad was my best friend.  That must be hard on you. And yeah, for medical reasons you should know more.  

Have a great day today.

lisa41076 said...

Lisa, I always enjoy your pictures !!!!!!! Have a blessed day with your daughter and grandson, Hugs Lisa

katie39041 said...

Loved seeing your pics, the one in the mud well its so natural, Not a care about how filthy you look and no make up. lol. I will get that email off to you but my levels are low so i am off for a well earned nap.
love and hugs

loveladylisa1 said...

Thanks for sharing. It's nice reading and getting to know a bit more about you. It's so true that our past shapes us as adults. I still hear what my mom would now think of as innocent little statements, but here they still are... claning away in my head.

Have a wonderful day with your daughter and grandson!

astoriasand said...

Lovely pics once again Lisa I have realy enjoyed them.Sorry you do not see your real father .It's such a shame when these things happen in someones life.Maybe it would help if you knew the medical side of his side of the family more,with your condition.I can understand what you mean about the one sentence your mum spoke to you and the eating disorder.My son has gained lots of weight with his medication and he realy struggles to try to keep slim as he was.This son is over here in England.Not the one in USA .He had a heart attack at the age of 36yrs.Always fit as a lop football referee,and sport mad. He is now back refereeing,but he cannot lose much more weight no matter how he tries the meds just gain it again as fast as he loses it.So it is difficult I understand you fully on that one.I hope you have a wonderful time today with Daughter and Kayden.Take Care God Bless Kath
Astoriasand http://journals.aol.co.uk/astoriasand/MYSIMPLERHYMES

kamdghwmw said...

I love the pictures. I do hope that you have a great day with your grandson.

ajquinn354 said...

Lisa, some times without meaning too, someone's comment can change a persons life, sorry yours wasn't a positive comment, would have made life so much nicer for you versus having to deal with anorexia.  Try to wash all negative comments from your heart forever dear, you have enough going on with your own health, you don't need to remember those things or hear those things.  Bless you. Arlene (AJ)

queeniemart said...

always love your pics....you are pretty no matter what your weight...why dont you hear from your biological father? I must have met you on here after you talked about that.

siennastarr said...