Friday, May 18, 2007

T.G.I.F.!!!! YAY!!!

.....Just to let you know, nothing in this journal's entry is toward anyone in specific, I use it to write my feelings, and about my illnesess,and in hopes it might help someone else as I do. And if you might take an entry wrong and feel that it is about you, I'm sorry but It isn't, it just may seem to coincide with your own life. May God bless you!......


 



Good evening to all! I hope that you all are feeling good and at least fine! :o)


I was able to go back to bed this morning at 6:30! YAY! :o) I got 3 hours of sleep! Thats was good. ;o)
I had alot of help with that stupid night mare. Thank you so much to you! :o) I have a feeling I won't have it again! :o)
I also did alot of praying. I got my answer! Something I already knew! The evil has already taken him over! That is what I was told! Sad.
I'm doing my best to not be an enabler by asking and telling him to get help. It's not like I've just started this...for many years. The true love of the bottle has over powered him. I've just finally realized this last night! I know it's a sickness; but nothing and no one can take the love he has for the bottle! That has been proven!

My daughter is now ready to move out with her boy friend! :o) I'm happy for her. ;o)
Now...it's time for me! :o) After all of this toxic time together...it needs an ending. I will no longer put up with the meaness any longer! I can't! My body can't take it! So...as soon as I can...I will be finding a place for me! :o) Just the thought of it has risen my emotions! :o)
So much has happened just within this weeks time in this house...and it has all turned to the good! :o) I've thanked God for that! :o)

I will be glad to live in peace! Something I've longed for for sooo long! No more lies...no more! I can only be me...and thats it! :o)
I will no longer be told lies...have someone come to me and tell me he told them a lie...and no more catching him in his lies! It's too much for me. He broke up my marrage to my daughter's father! I've found out these things throughout the years! I loved him with all my heart! Too late now! I thought something different! Not so. :o( My feelings will never change.
On a different note....
Thank all of you for all of your support! I mean it from the bottom of my heart! :o)
Thank you for all of your comments too! They really do keep me going and wanting to write more! :o) Gods blessings to all of you! :o)


 


21 comments:

hugsdoodlewacky said...

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gehi6 said...

What a beautiful graphic but I am sorry you are alos experiencing the downside of someone close hooked on alcohol.  It is just so difficult to see any change.  You may have to split for your own sake.  At my age, a health crisis might intervene, and might not.  I totally understand your dilemma.   Gerry

nightmaremom said...

sending love, hugs, and strength
d

barbpinion said...

Praying for you, honey. Having been through it myself I know how hard it can be. You deserve the best.
Love & prayers,
Barb- http://journals.aol.com/barbpinion/HEYLETSTALK
        http://journals.aol.com/barbpinion/FROMBARBSSPIRITUALJOURNALS

barbpinion said...

Praying for you, honey. Having been through it myself I know how hard it can be. You deserve the best.
Love & prayers,
Barb- http://journals.aol.com/barbpinion/HEYLETSTALK
        http://journals.aol.com/barbpinion/FROMBARBSSPIRITUALJOURNALS.

dca721 said...

Hi Lisa,
Sorry you are having problems.
I need to catch up.
I haven't been online much lately, going through some problems of my own.
I wish you the best always.
Love,
Donna

lanurseprn said...

I hope you are able to get your own peaceful place, if you want that. Good luck and will keep you in prayers.
Pam

lisa41076 said...

Lisa, you are always in my thoughts, Hugs Lisa

emabecmar said...

I agree Lisa. It is time you got away from there. I grew up with an alcoholic father, and it was not fun. You deserve some peace, and some happiness, and you also deserve the right to feel you are home and not walking on egg shells. I hope and I pray a place comes along real quick that you can call home. (((((((hugs))))))))
Love,
Cindy

my78novata said...

yeah I think you getting a place would be the best hting. Man I did not know he broke up the marraige that badly. how in the world that is sosad.

helmswondermom said...

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heavenlybama said...

BTDT.  You're in my thoughts and prayers.
Hugs,
D
http://journals.aol.com/heavenlybama/journey-to-success

thegirlnexdoor77 said...

Hugs to you!  Keeping you all in my prayers and thoughts!  Hope your weekend goes well!  Hugs,TerryAnn

trishaham said...

Lisa, I have not been by in touch in such a long time.I had to make my journal private, because of the job search. Anyway, I was so surprised at this entry. I am so sorry to hear that you have been living with this situation with your husband. in silence for so long. I am praying for you both. I hope you are able  to find your peace. It sounds as though you are heading in the right direction. You are such a proud and strong woman. You are much admird.

Tia

astoriasand said...

You keep thinking possitive Lisa .I am behind you in all this and if I can support you and help you just give me a knock at my E. Mail door.OK!! The time comes when one has to move on and like I said once before, as one door closes another one always opens, believe you me.The grass is always greener on the other side.You deserve better than this and to be loved and treat with respect and you will have better than what you have had to endure all these yrs..Do not look back NEVER  look forward if it is only in tiny steps.Don't Try and RUN before you can WALK  and everything will fall into place YIPEE with all your friend for support.Have a lovely week/end I hope it is free from pain and you soon feel a little better than normaly.Hugs To all the family Kath
Astoriasand http://journals.aol.co.uk/astoriasnd/MYSIMPLERHYMES

sweetestsin52605 said...

Madre,
 I believe that he is getting worse and it will only get worse before it gets any better. He is turning into his dad. I know him, and whatever he wants, he gets, and therefore breaking you and dad up. He wanted you and he got you. But now, I don't know what is going on. You are like his prisioner like on Silence of the Lambs. Sad, but kinda true. And with him hating me leaving and he doesnt want me to move in with Jeremy. 1. he is my babys dad and we are together..so it will be easier on me. 2. i am 22!! 3. get over it. lol..im not 12 anymore. Im an adult, a mother and a lover. :) I love you mom!! Get some rest!
<3 Nena

jckfrstross said...

have a good weekend:)

Deb

pharmolo said...

Have a great weekend, Lisa :-)

rdautumnsage said...

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jmoqueen said...

Awww Lisa I hope you will find some happiness soon xx

Jenny

http://journals.aol.co.uk/jmoqueen/MyLife/

queeniemart said...

i hope and pray your future holds good health and PEACE.
LOVE, lj