Answering a few of your comments

.....Just to let you know, nothing in this journal's entry is toward anyone in specific, I use it to write my feelings, and about my illnesess, and in hopes it might help someone else as I do.I do not pretend nor imatate to be someone I'm not.I have to be careful, apparently someone are way too obsessed with 'my' life. And if you might take an entry wrong and feel that it is about you, I'm sorry but It isn't, it just may seem to coincide with your own life. And if there is something in what I write that "offends" you, options; don't read, or realize that this IS real life, and get out of your plastic bubble and learn more about it! God bless you!......

 

 

Well....I got a lot of mixed opinions! So, I just picked a few comments out and I'm going to answer them! Then maybe there won't be anymore assuming about dh.

I've been reading your journal for quite some time now and to be honest I was surprised to learn that you are gay. I have no problem with that. What I do wonder however is what about your husband? Is is fair to him for you to continue in this relationship? I hope you are able to get into an assisted living situation soon. Perhaps you both need to start new chapters in your life. After all, this can't be easy for your husband either.

Firstly, I want to thank you for stoping by and reading my journal. About dh.....we've been divorced since 1986. I've lived with him off and on through the years.
In the state of Ohio, if you live with someone for a period of time, they consider you married. Thats why I still call him my husband.If I really wanted to, I could leave him and take him to divorce court, but I'm not that way and would never do that. I'm not going to disclose our bedroom secrets, but I will say this; Yes, he's fine with this and like I wrote in my last entry, he already knew. He told me how he had figured it out. And he did give me permission to have a girlfriend
over if I want to. He said that it doesn't bother him. Is this fair to him? Yes, or he wouldn't have told me that he was fine with it and have a girl here. I agree
with starting a new chapter in our lives. And we both feel that we have from our talks. Yes it is easier now for my husband. I can't go into that, because
I'm not going to go into our bedroom secrets.

I for one are pleased that you are now out in the open. You will feel 100% better. The stress you have carried on your shoulders must have been horrendous. It all takes its toll. You are now being true to yourself a big thing and a whole new world. I do think you and hubby need to talk more. As to what your future holds i wish you all the best and loads of love to go along side of you.
Love and fibro hugs.

Thank you. Yes, I do feel 100% better. It was very stressful to carry this for so long. That is why I talked to him, I had to let him know the real me. Being
true to myself is what I and him both needed. And yes, we will talk more about it. And thank you for your support as well.

 

I can promise you have not lost me as a reader for you being honest about "you!"!! What a relief you must be feeling I am so happy you were able to be honest about who you really are. I am also very happy that your husband knows he cannot treat you this way anymore. I have your back hun :)

Thank you for not leaving me and my journal....I really appreciate that! Yes it was a huge relief to tell him. Plus, a relief for him as well. (would have to disclose bedroom secrets to explain why) Yes, he sure does now....by reading that pamplet I was given about what is abuse to someone disabled.
He didn't realize a lot of the things listed are abuse. And reading it and seeing that I can press charges...made him stop and think about a lot of things.
Thank you for also having my back as well! I appreciate it.

Please by no means am I suggesting by this it is an excuse....but do you think you husband may also be taking out on you is also being frustrated that he does not have a full wife? Not only with your illness but now well, he knew but the idea that you are gay? Again, that is a lot singularly for anyone to deal with & if they are not talking about it, which men don't, and maybe he feels he can't leave to be happy so....again not excusing him or saying you should feel guilty AT ALL but this needs to be addressed. I think you moving out is a great first step for all. Are you going to talk to your daughter?

No! I know that isn't the case. When I was his wife, I was a FULL wife to him and lying to myself. And, my illnesses have nothing to do with me not being a Full wife or a FULL person, and why would it?Do you say that to others with illnesses too, that they're not a FULL person? It's also not
an 'idea' that I'm gay either, it's a fact. And no, I don't feel guilty, I have no reason to. And yes he is talking about it, we talk for hours last night.
And will continue to.Not all men are the same either, we are talking. And by me telling him and by us talking about it, is addressing it. Yes, both of my children know. And they too are fine about it. My daughter said that this just gives her something else to make fun of me with! LOL

 

HAHAHAHAHA The video did it for me. Too funny!!!!
And you sure did let the world know. :-)
Glad you guys got to talk about how he treats you.
Have a good day.
love ya

This comment was left from my daughter! Does that answer your question?

My children are 25 and 22 years old. It's not like they are small children. I also raised them to NOT be color blind, and that everyone is human. It's not the outside or illnesses or even a sexual preferance that makes a person, it's their soul! Is it not? I'm as full of a person just like everyone else! And why wouldn't I be?

Moving on.....
Yes, we do and did talk a lot about a lot of things last night. And we will again tonight. He has excepted me for me, for all of these years. Is that wrong? We are good friends! And no, I will not let him treat me like he did the other night, because I have the strength to stand up and put my foot down to stop it. Now that he knows that I could turn him in....he has a different outlook. He learned that last night by reading that pamplet. And I'm gald and proud of him for actually reading it!

I want to thank you for being a friend to me. Even on my bad days. At least by coming out has shown me who my true friends are and who my fake friends are! Thank you.

 

Tags: True and fake friends, coming out, Love, My life!